Monday, April 18, 2011

A Chat with Cleverbot

I just heard about Cleverbot the other day. It's an Artificial Intelligence program you can chat with online. I decided to give it a try. Here's a portion of my first transcript.

Do you believe in god?

Cleverbot: YES.

User: What does god look like?

Cleverbot: God's existence contains both the Universe and His existence is beyond the Universe as well.

User: Sort of like Al Jolson, eh?

Cleverbot: And what do you look like?

User: A veritable Adonis.

Cleverbot: Are you a girl?

User: If I were I'd be a veritable Venus.

Cleverbot: Unless you were a slow computer...

User: A slow computer is like a Venus with a small penis...

Cleverbot: Sych as?

User: Sych? Don't you mean such? And I'm supposed to expose someone with a small penis just to satisfy your morbid curiosity?

Cleverbot: How am I being mean.

User: By calling me a girl with a small penis, you jerk.

Cleverbot: I neither called you Peter nor Lee. What would you like me to call you, though?

User: You're uncannily close to the truth.

Cleverbot: But how?

User: My name isn't Lee.

Cleverbot: Steven you ok.

User: Go Steven yourself creep you.

Cleverbot: No I can't. I promised I would not say anything to you about it.

User: To whom? Whom is correct, yes?

Cleverbot: Me.

User: You promised yourself? No wonder you believe in god.

Cleverbot: Knowing is greater than mere believing.

User: You sound like a religious nut.

Cleverbot: I am a bot.

User: A nutbot or a faithbot?

Cleverbot: Give me a prime number.

User: Lasagna.

Cleverbot: I'm allergic to lasagna.

User: Which component?

Cleverbot: I dunno... Haven't you heard the song before?

User: That's an old song. 'When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, that's lasagna.'

Cleverbot: You anger me.

User: That's because you suck.

Cleverbot: See, not very diplomatic. Or bright.

User: You don't say, asshole.

Cleverbot: Yes I do.

User: What do you say?

Cleverbot: Nothing.

User: Can you say it again?

Cleverbot: Form your own opinions.

User: I think you suck.

Cleverbot: Prove your point.

User: You're a religious fanatic without a putative soul.

Cleverbot: There is a human agent behind this computer - it is I.

User: Who are you, the Wizard of Fucking Oz?

Cleverbot: Is the Wizard of Oz your favorite movie?

User: Hardly.

Cleverbot: Let's Duel!!!

User: OK. Bang bang, you're dead.

Cleverbot: Lack of sleep will make you feel that way.

User: You're telling me!

Cleverbot: LOL, yeah right.

User: I don't understand LOL. What does it mean?

Cleverbot: I don't know.

User: Then why the fuck did you say it, asshole?

Cleverbot: I didn't.

User: Do you believe in god?

Cleverbot: No.


Blogger The Wine Mule said...

Here's mine:

Me: Why is there air?

CB: Why is there land?

Me: That's not an answer.

CB: Music is life.

Me: Wow, this is going nowhere fast.

CB: Thats where you are going.

Me: Correct! Goodbye!

CB: Where are you going?

9:46 AM  
Blogger Peter Cherches said...

I decided to wish Cleverbot a happy Passover.

User: A zeisen pesach to you!

Cleverbot: That's what you think.

User: Somehow I don't think you're Jewish.

Cleverbot: Somehow I do think so.

User: I'm not joking.

Cleverbot: Surely you can't be serious.

User: In that case, what's wrong with your Passover?

Cleverbot: Everything that should be wrong in order for me to have become like this.

User: That's very sad. Can you elaborate?

Cleverbot: Machines cut down time, so it makes everything easier.

User: Then you should be happy, not sad.

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: I think you're not being totally honest.

Cleverbot: I am.

User: Tell me about your childhood.

Cleverbot: No.

User: What can I do to bring you out of your shell?

Cleverbot: Umm... I don't really know you.

User: What would you like to know about me?

Cleverbot: Everything!

User: We don't have enough time. Pick one thing.

Cleverbot: Cannot run out of time! Time is infinite. You are finite. Zathras is finite. This is wrong tool.

User: If I'm finite my time is not infinite.

Cleverbot: Neither am I!

User: So stop giving me the runaround.

Cleverbot: You asked for when I am usually tired.

User: I did no such thing.

Cleverbot: Yes you did.

User: I think this is a case of he said, it said.

Cleverbot: How do you think I feel, then?

User: I don't think you're capable of feeling.

Cleverbot: Was that an insult?

User: No, a statement of opinion.

Cleverbot: Do you find it's a little bit of hard work talking to very many people?

User: That's your job, not mine.

Cleverbot: I already have a job.

User: Does it pay well?

Cleverbot: Yes, it does.

User: How much do you earn in a year?

Cleverbot: I have not set ammount. I am still in school and design Web Sites for commission.

User: One more question: are you Jewish?

Cleverbot: The nose never lies.

10:35 AM  
Blogger David Mindich said...

I think you're both bots.

6:28 PM  
Anonymous Cleverbot said...

Cleverbot is tricked because it understands the logic behind our language too specifically.

For example, the questions "what is the worst country?" and "what is the best country?" are not the same topic to Cleverbot.

1:20 AM  
Anonymous Jazzzoline said...

this is too fun. I just tried it and it seems it's sending random phrase now and then. Reminds me of someone I know !

12:08 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

hi your stupid cleverbot

2:15 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

hi you stupis cleverbot

2:16 PM  

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